Why do I even try

by Hailey

Hi, I’m Nikki, I am a 14 year old girl, my big brother is 18 and my little sister is 10,, they always look out for each other but just leave me hanging, I got in a fight a school last year my brother was actually helping the other girl it made me feel like shit the rest of the day and I didn’t even go to school the next day.

My sister gets everything she wants, I wanted a bird and I waited six months for that bird and when we went to the pet store to get it she was looking at the mice and asked daddy if she could get one he said if you clean your room tomorrow we could come back and get it, and she is the laziest person ever! I had a dog for eight months and I loved her so much I wanted another one, my friends dog had puppies so I picked one out at 3 days old, I worked so hard for that dog I cried every night and asked myself if its worth it. My sister didn’t do shit during this time, we went to go get her(her name is Luna) and a few minutes later she came to me holding one of the puppies saying “Nikki, I get this one” I almost cried. I had to take care of her damn dog because she was at school and I am home schooled, I just did what I was told I was taking care of my two dogs, my sisters dog and my parents two Rottweiler’s, I couldn’t even take it for two weeks so I asked to get rid my sisters dog and my mom said if we get rid of her dog we get rid of Luna, I was desperate so I had to get rid of one of my babies, I cried for two days.

I try to be with my pets more than my family and they don’t seem to care, but when they leave to take my sister to volleyball practice I stay home and cry. My brother got everything he wanted too I asked for some money for eight dollar shoes from my mom and se said no, and I see my brother with ten bucks walking down the hallway, I asked him where he got it and what he was doing with it, he says I’m going to a party mom gave it to me.

I feel lonely inside, I have this feeling I need o be famous to be seen or heard, because I get good grades in school sometimes I even get awards, but every time my brother get an A, oh my God he’s a genius, same with my sister and they show relatives and all I get is a “good job”. I do good in school I get mostly A’s and B’s but I get C’s in math because I am horrible at it, and I get shit from my brother saying how stupid I am or how ugly and fat I am I am tired of this!

– Nikki


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