No One Likes Me

Ever since I was little I had to seek constant reassurance that I was good, or being good or doing well, and I always had low self esteem.

I had an older sister who is only 1 and a half years older than me, but she always got to do things first and got and get the best things first and I get hand-me-downs from her, even though I hate her style. When I was like 6 my mom said she was having a baby and I was excited. I was going to be the older sister now and I was going to get to teach her things and such… but when she was born, I never even got to hold her because my sister was older and got to hold her first and by the time I got her she was crying. Then she got older and instead of me getting things first or doing things first, it was always either my big sister or my little sister because “she’s youngest” or “she’s oldest” and I was always in the middle.

I started making sure I was last all the time just so I wouldn’t be in the middle. then we moved and my big sister got the biggest room with a closet, (mine has pipes in it so I cant even use it) and I wanted the smallest because it has 2 closets and a walk in one which I always wanted, but my mom got mad because my little sister wanted it so I just got the middle sized room with no closet. I always feel like people like my sisters more and that no one likes me at all or even hate me, and I’m always sad and really hate life. I wish my mom and dad loved me more and didn’t treat me so badly compared to my sisters…

Rebecca

Invisible

I never really believed that middle children were treated any different from others up until a few months ago–in fact, I thought it was just a way for whiny teenagers to angst about their family when they had nothing else to complain about. This may be true, but recently I’ve noticed more and more than I’ve been ignored by my parents while my little brother works to keep it that way.

My parents are divorced, but we always end up moving back in forth between living with both parents and then living with my mother. In the last three years I’ve moved 3 or 4 times, spent quite a few weeks in hotels. It’s been stressful on all of us kids. My older brother got out of it when he left for college, and ever since my little brother has become more and more of a tyrant.

Everywhere I turn he has something to criticize about me. He calls me fat and ugly–at the moment I’m struggling with anorexia and have gotten to such an unhealthy low weight, and still he berates my figure, telling me to exercise and stop eating. He always laughs in my face when I mention college. I’m too stupid to get into college–I should just drop out already, since I’ll probably be pregnant before the year is up. (Even though I haven’t so much as had my first kiss, never mind sex.) I’ve recently done experimentation with makeup and my clothing. He has since started to call me a slut and tells me to stop wearing “whore-paint”. No matter what I do he criticizes me; and whatever I’m good at he brushes it off and says I’ll never get anywhere in life with it. (Those things being writing and drawing) He, at times, even goes so far as to be physically abusive when I don’t give him what he wants leaving scratches and bruises on my arms.

My mother has seen all of this and doesn’t step in. Sure, she yells at him at times, but he just laughs in her face and keeps doing it. I’ve told her that I don’t like what he says and does and that she is being unfair and I end up as the bad guy in the situation for “always bothering her”. I don’t misbehave much; I’m relatively respectful but I’ve lost so much respect for my parents that it’s hard not to snap and yell at them every once in a while. My grades are the only thing my parents can fault me for, where my little brother drinks and parties and curses to his heart’s content. But, since he still somehow manages to get As and Bs, I’m the one who is in the wrong. I can’t even see my friends because I’m selfish when I ask for a ride, but my brother can see his girlfriend and friends whenever he wants–and my somehow my mother always complains that I don’t have a social life and I need to get out of the house and stop being such a loser.

I’m so sick of this. I can’t do anything right even though I try hard to be a good daughter and sister. I don’t have a voice in my house because I’m too tired of being yelled at, so I’m not bothering to stand up for myself anymore. I’m angry and miserable and so inevitably powerless. It feels like I’ll never get out.

Nina

Ganging Up on the Middle

I am Olivia and I have an older sister and a younger brother and my parents favor me. My sister and brother tease me all the time for being a straight A student and still be popular pretty and nice.

Well I’m a kind of girl that looks at the big picture and not at the little stuff and so when my sister asked me if I liked chinchillas I said no and she asked why. I replied to that overall I think they are just annoying.(no offense to chinchilla lovers) they always gang up on me and it’s so annoying. They try to mimic me and it makes me so mad that they only look at the bad side of things.

Sure I am a perfectionist and am kind of stubborn and hold grudges but that’s only the bad stuff and I have millions of other bad things also but I have billions of good things about me also. I’m nice and peaceful and all I want in life is to be happy with God and my family around me. I also laugh a lot at stupid stuff that’s not even funny but if it makes me happier than why is it so hard to just let me be!

One little insult just makes them feel perfect and my brother and sister get my words and twist them. My brother once told me I was as skinny as a stick and I said that he has a high voice. Well now he says that I called him gay which is not true. My sister says that she used to looks like me which is not true. I have long blonde wavy hair and she has kind of wavy brown hair but when she was my age is wasn’t wavy at all. I told her hair was more raggedy when she was my age, which is true and she twisted it up and say that I said that she has raggedy hair. It annoys me to breaking point but I don’t cry around them or anything and they call me a baby.

They say I’m too proud of the bad things about me like perfectionist and stuff buy I’m not glad about I’m just accepting it. I don’t know what to do when they mock me and make fun of me while at the same time ganging up on me!

Olivia

Stuck at the Middle

I’m the middle of a family with 3 boys. I grew up with a younger brother bugging the ever living day light out of me, trying to be better than me (until he grew taller than me) while looking up to my older brother, who ignored me. I played with my figurines and spent much of my time day dreaming.

Because I was ignored because of my quiet nature in contrast to my hyperactive younger brother and my “must have everything according to schedule” older brother, I seemed to be high maintenance demanding attention through actions and money from my parents. My younger brother has a larger bone structure than me and my older brother is taller than me. I seem to make up for this by having expensive taste in clothes. I used to get into arguments which usually ended in my father hitting me.

I’ve never been good at making friends and freeze and let a chance pass by me when I have a chance of meeting a girl. I joined the army which didn’t help and almost had a suicidal mental breakdown after spending 14 weeks in unbearable conditions only to fail the last test because I lacked command presence

I’m now 24 moved away from home (to another country) unemployed struggling to get a job a creative writing type of field and trying to bring up a shred of confidence at a job interview in order to survive and I escape reality with whatever entertainment I can find.

Is there no better text book example of middle child syndrome? It is scary to think my life has been somewhat set on a path or decided in accordance to the order in which I was born.

Sam

Woes of a Middle Child

I’m 13 years old and of course the middle child. I have an older sister and a younger brother. It seems that all the time my sister will randomly pick a fight with me and I will always be the one to get in trouble. Other times I will just be sitting in my room doing homework and my little brother will come in with his nerf guns and I will chase him around the house in response then get into trouble for “attacking” my little brother.

I’m unsure if my parents just don’t like me or if it just comes with being the middle child. Not to mention I am a high honors student and both of my siblings get C’s. When I’m not getting yelled at by my parents, I feel like I am constantly doing other people’s chores. It’s like I don’t even exist unless I’m being yelled at or asked by my parents to do my little brother’s chores because he is still too young to be doing the dishes (he’s 12).

My parents don’t even just push my siblings’ chores on me though. Just last night my mother had me cook an entire meal ( Fish, rice, broccoli) by myself so she could sit and watch TV then when I asked her for a new $10 shirt that I had wanted forever she said I hadn’t earned it then proceeded to spend $50 on call of duty for my little brother. I am also usually responsible for my sister’s chores as well because she is also sleeping or yeah she’s typically sleeping. Is it usual for a middle child to be given all the responsibilities and for the younger child to be given all the gifts and freedom or do my parents just hate me and favor my brother?

Heather